It's Not Everyday Your Sister Gets Married!

One of the greatest privileges I could have was being the matron of honor for my sister's wedding. To play any role in making my sister's wedding day beautiful and special for her is something I can cherish forever, it also comes with all the feels that I must tell you about.

Since the beginning of my time, Courtney has always been there. She was born 2 years, 9 months, and 4 days before me. She reached every milestone, talking, walking, reading, writing, etc before me. As we grew older her bedtime was later than mine, she got to go out with her friends to the mall without mom before I did, she even wore makeup before I did and boy was I jealous but alas thats how life works! She was first, I was second and it was our dynamic in all things.

This forced me to have youngest child syndrome where I raced to copy her and be just like her and that of course annoyed her and there were a few years we extremely disliked each other. I thought she was so mean and she thought I was big baby. Then, when I was twelve our parents separated. Quickly our differences didn't matter as we had to navigate these new waters, it was us against the world. It was petty fights and squabbles, because face it we were teenage girls but it was apologizing to on another, being each others shoulder to cry on (me, more than her because Courtney rarely cries), being the first ones we told things to, and empowering one another and just laughing. Courtney and I are great at that, laughing, we have the same sense of humor although our viewpoints on most things are opposite.

As we became young adults, I started going out with Courtney to gatherings, making friends, actually having a life outside of home because I'm a homebody naturally and Courtney absolutely loves going out and meeting new people. So, we were Courtney and Morgan. Wherever Courtney was, Morgan was invited and we rode together, because Courtney could drive way before me, had a great time, and cackled on the rides back home. This went on for years. Then comes boys. I was late to noticing boys or dating in general but when I met Marc, I knew I found the one and it was forward march with everything we had. We were boyfriend-girlfriend, fiance, and then husband and wife.

Throughout my engagement, Courtney was a fantastic maid of honor, I don't want to discredit her and will be grateful for every ounce of love she put into planning my showers. Still, nothing compared to how I loved her on the day I got married. Courtney although she couldn't offer much advice about wedding she went above and beyond for me, dedicated to what she could do. She helped me put on my false eyelashes, cried when I gave her the maid of honor gift and she read her card, she helped me into my dress , laced my shoes because I couldn't see past all the lace, and looked me over to make sure I looked perfect. I remember being on the platform and she went to grab my bouquet to hold for me and she cried and hugged me tight and I'm sure all the love a sister can possible have over decades poured out into my soul. I remember thinking she never cries but she cries with joy for me, I was worth her tears. On my wedding day she she was there for me and I knew for her on her day I had to be there for her.

Fast forward, 7 months, and now it's her turn. I get to fuss over her, fetch her whatever. she needed, fawn over her beauty and lets be clear she was beautiful. Courtney was glowing from within. She had 1920s finger waves and a head band and a mermaid wedding gown that showed her curves and made her look so elegant and glamorous. One thing I've always admired about Courtney was her wide eyes and cheekbones and they were all popping! She looked amazing and I wanted her to feel amazing and not stress. Now, it was my turn to step up to the plate and help her out. Now I helped her into her shoes , clasped her earrings, looked her over so she was just so. Marc and I drove her to the ceremony and I did whatever she told me as we waited for it to start. I was there doing whatever she needed. It was crazy of all the years of me needing her, on this day, she needed me for a day! As she walked down the aisle I was looked at her and saw that she finally got what she really needed and that was her man.

The moment I will remember fondest is when we were getting ready to leave the reception and so were the bride and groom. I hugged my new brother-in-law , told him to have fun but it was my sister, I hugged tightly, telling her how much I loved her, trying to give all the love I ever had for her into one hug. I didn't want to let go because I needed her to feel every bit of gratitude I have for being her sister, for her helping me, being an example to me, supporting me in whatever endeavor I wanted to do.Courtney was a big part of why I started this blog she's been telling me for years I need to do something like this! I hugged her, gave her some quick advice, we made each other cry, and left quickly so as not to linger. I choose to believe we cried because gone are the years of Courtney and Morgan and now were our new chapter of Marc and Morgan and Marcus and Courtney. We cried for all bad nights we had, for all the good ones too, for movie nights on the couch, late night food runs, random Target shopping, and bachata music while doing the dishes. We cried for the love and happiness that can only come from finding the one your soul truly loves and that we are sisters for life, regardless of last name or location.

My wedding day was the first time I was doing anything first before Courtney. She couldn't advise me, I couldn't just do whatever she did, I had to wing it. Still in big sister fashion, I couldn't do it without her. I still needed her. I will always need her. First, last, second, or third the formerly known as Barr sisters as sisters to the core. I don't weep over her moving away because of sadness but I do, just as she did, I weep with joy! I cry because her future with her husband, Marcus ( I know married a Marc and she married a Marcus, yes we will confuse you often with this) is so bright and to see her smile and cry at her wedding over their love. She never cries, unless it's important and their kind of love, if you saw it, is worth every tear. Congratulations, Courtney and Marcus, I love you both dearly. So wonderfully happy to share in your moment.